215. Why Is My Life So Difficult? Jesus Doesn’t Seem To Help Me.

[00:00:08] Hi Friends welcome to another episode of Making Disciples. My name is Cris and I am your host It's really, really good to spend this time with you. Thank you for giving me a bit of

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[00:02:31] their thoughts along teeing in. This episode is trying to answer a question that one of our listeners are sent in. I just think it's such a valuable question and over the years we've had similar kind of questions

[00:02:46] that we haven't necessarily addressed so I thought this would be a really good one to do it. Now the listeners asked could they remain anonymous so not to share their name. Most of them only give their first name anyway but

[00:02:57] please don't share their name but what they asked was this why is my life so difficult Jesus doesn't seem to help me. Why is my life so difficult Jesus doesn't seem to help me I think that's a great question

[00:03:15] because it does often feel doesn't it that life is full of moments where it just is so hard to get through. Either you know health issue a conflict issue, financial thing a pipe parenting thing, a relationship thing.

[00:03:38] People just seem to get in your way and say stupid things and conflicts arise. Why is it so difficult? And then we go look look when I when I had a question I thought this was all going to get sorted.

[00:03:52] I thought when I came to follow Jesus, then he would sort all this stuff out you know the Bible says that Jesus will make my path straight.

[00:04:01] Well many times I don't feel like my path is straight. I feel it is mirandering or it's not going where I want it to go and you think Jesus where are you?

[00:04:10] I really thought you were going to step up for me so that's what we're going to look at today. Why why is my life so difficult? Jesus doesn't seem to be helpful that is what we are going to explore.

[00:04:24] So friends let's dive in and so look at this question and reflect on this question a little bit about why is it that life is so different. So why is my life so difficult? Jesus doesn't seem to help me.

[00:04:47] Friends, couple of thoughts that I'm going to reflect on in this session today. The first is this people who you know we as Christians should say often think that when we become a Christian then in that moment where we become a Christian, Jesus starts helping us.

[00:05:07] It's almost like it's invisible force that is now there helping us and therefore we think that our struggles are going to disappear. We think that things like our sinful thoughts will just stop.

[00:05:21] That suddenly you might know your purpose in life that suddenly you know where you're going and what you're about, what you were called to do.

[00:05:28] You're a couple of people question and I'll suddenly know my purpose and then you become a Christian think I know I have a clue what I meant to do with my life.

[00:05:36] We think that when we become a Christian everything of faith will just suddenly make sense it will fall into place. If you're a Christian you'll suddenly understand it all.

[00:05:45] You think that just become a Christian that suddenly your body will be healthier and sickness is going to be a problem for you or ill health is going to be a problem for you.

[00:05:56] Use think that because you become a Christian that suddenly relationship problems are going to start, that actually relationships will now just work out fine.

[00:06:05] If only they became a Christian you know husbands and wives say if they were just become a Christian I'm married would be so much easier. That doesn't always work out to plan. Often we think when we become a Christian that suddenly our lives will be more peaceful.

[00:06:21] We talk a lot about you know receive Jesus and you like his peace in your heart and you think you know the moment you become a Christian. Suddenly you'll become more peaceful and friends it's just not the case.

[00:06:33] We find time again that people become Christians and their struggles don't go they're sin doesn't stop. They don't suddenly know their purpose, they don't sort of have health relationship issues don't just disappear they don't suddenly have peace.

[00:06:48] In fact friends we just have to make it really clear it isn't promised Jesus never promised us that we would become Christians and suddenly it would all make sense. The Bible does time and time again say you know when we are following God.

[00:07:02] We're walking in these paths and then he will be at work and he'll be making a difference to our path and he'll be working it out. And I have to say that when people become a Christian just being there suddenly now on God's straight path.

[00:07:17] It sometimes takes time to get on God's straight path and just because you come to realize who Jesus does not mean that the location that you're in the path that you're walking on.

[00:07:29] It's still the path to go forward you know often we've drifted away from what God wants for our lives and then we've got to get back onto what he does want for our lives.

[00:07:39] So it's not the case just not the case that it will be straightforward and it's not the case that God promised us our lives was suddenly become perfect.

[00:07:49] What Jesus does promise us is that the alienation that we have between us and God would go that is the alienation between God and us that will be rectified and that actually the relationship with us and him. We'll now be opening up. It struggles remain.

[00:08:13] We do become more aware of our sinfulness. So that's in disappears we actually become more aware of it. We are still lost in not understanding our purpose and our problems will continue to persist.

[00:08:29] And these things are still you know playing out. So you have to answer this question then why is it there that life is so hard? What is it about life that is so hard just because you have become a Christian does not mean all of the things that are going to take you off God's path of suddenly disappeared.

[00:08:47] So why is it hard? Well friends, one of the reasons why life is so hard is because of temptation and until we've worked out what to do with our temptation and until we've put things in place that will help us with our temptation, temptation remains.

[00:09:03] Friends, one of the reasons why life is so hard is the battle is within me. It's not all about the devil. It's not all the devil's fault. There's a battle raging on inside of me my sinfulness is a long-ging a certain path for my life.

[00:09:19] You know I've spent so many times with new Christians who will say the devil's attacking me and I'm thinking to myself friends you've got you're attacking yourself.

[00:09:29] Your decisions that you are making are actually pretty poor. You don't need the devil to attack your life. You're doing a really good job at doing it yourself.

[00:09:36] I would recognize that about me. I don't know if you recognize this about you but the devil is definitely at work. The evil one is definitely at work.

[00:09:45] But it's almost like sometimes the devil doesn't need to do a great deal because I'm very good at damaging my own life. I'm very good at making foolish decisions myself. So the battle is within us and there's a sinfulness that's been drawn by this temptation.

[00:10:01] Friends, life is so hard because of the poor choices that we make and so many of my Christian friends just make really poor decisions in their life.

[00:10:11] And they can't see how it's a poor decision. And then there weren't any why life is so difficult. Why they're getting themselves in trouble with the police? You know, you did make a decision that actually was a criminal act.

[00:10:23] And a friend of the day, he was complaining that he'd been fined and that he'd gone to church and he'd part his car in a location. And when he came out he'd been fined. He's like, how could God do that to me? I'd been to the church.

[00:10:38] And then asking where he parked and he parked on the bottom of the double yellow line. I'm thinking, just because you're going in church does not mean that actually suddenly God's gonna protect your car from the parking guy.

[00:10:50] Poor choices. Sometimes we people make just poor choices. And that's why life is difficult for them to do in it themselves. Sometimes life is difficult because the poor choices of other people are the will of other people.

[00:11:05] And sometimes life is difficult for people when you look around them, you realize that they're surrounded by people who consistently make bad decisions. And that's affecting their life because their friends poor decisions. I've rightly done this like this. Like magnets, unwise, draw the unwise around.

[00:11:27] I do recognize this that very often unwise people are like magnets for more unwise people. And if you find yourself in a situation where you go, why is life so difficult? Why is it that I keep getting fines on my car?

[00:11:45] Parking fines on my car when I go to church. You have to ask the question, am I surrounded by white with wise people who are going to say, actually this decision you keep making is really silly. Stop parking on, don't be alone, you won't get the fine.

[00:11:57] So like magnets, unwise, draw the unwise around them. Friends, wise life so hard. Actually sometimes life is just so hard. Sometimes life is just hard work. It is not plain sailing. And sometimes two or three things come along and they're heavy.

[00:12:17] And they are too heavy to carry in their entitlement. You might have one thing comes along, you can cope with that. Two things come along, you can kind of cope. Three things come along and I can no longer cope. Life sometimes is just hard.

[00:12:33] And there's this thing causing effect. Sometimes life is hard because of cause and effect. Sometimes we have done something in our past that we are still living with the consequences of foolish decisions from years gone by continue to be a problem.

[00:12:51] I know somebody who just applied to do some youth work and they did a DBS that's a check on their criminal background and they failed the DBS because of something they had done in the past.

[00:13:09] And then they are complaining that it is not fair that I can't do this particular youth work. And like well actually you are experiencing the consequences of behaviour from the past that actually got you to a lot of trouble

[00:13:21] for you to get something on your criminal record that's come back on your DBS.

[00:13:26] There's a reason actually that's there. And it's not God polishing you and it's not the devil is out to get you. It's a consequences, it's a cause and effect of your life and the decisions you made in the past.

[00:13:39] And then if you come across this book, the cost of discipleship by Deertrick Bonofer, the cost of discipleship by Deertrick Bonofer, brilliant book, Old Book, Old Book but not very thick, which means it's quite good to read.

[00:13:54] If you want a book to read the sum of the cost of discipleship by Deertrick Bonofer, in the book he says this, when all is said and done, the life of faith is nothing if not an ending struggle of the spirit with every available weapon against the flesh.

[00:14:13] It goes and say this, we would like our faith in Christ to put to an end the struggles about meaning and life direction and problems with us sin and wrongdoing.

[00:14:35] Faith does no such thing. Faith ends nothing except our alienation from God. These struggles continue and often intensify, sin and wrongdoing become much more sensitive and complex issues, even the issue of meaning of life remains as we seek to make our faith in Christ relevant in a flawed world and a matter of one's life direction becomes all the more pressing.

[00:15:04] Faith in Christ is as much as struggle as it is a way of peace. Love that life is a struggle just because you are now a disciple of Jesus does not mean life will become easy.

[00:15:18] Now Ephesians 2, 12, so it's being the Bible, it's pivoting the Bible for a second, Ephesians 2, 12, says this, work out your faith with fear and trembling, work out your faith with fear and trembling.

[00:15:31] In other words, what Paul is recognizing here is you may be saved but you still need to work out your faith that faith now needs to impact your life.

[00:15:41] So you might have said yes to Jesus but that saying yes to Jesus now needs to be worked out in your life because you've said yes to Jesus you may now need to say no to some things because you've said yes to Jesus you might need to say yes to some things you'd originally said no to you may need to now approach your life your money or resources your relationships in a different way.

[00:16:00] In a different manner because you've now said yes to Jesus so this yes is now going to change many decisions that you'd made in the past. Well, you originally said no to Jesus. So we have to take the necessary steps in life to work out our faith.

[00:16:19] So we need to take the necessary steps in life to work out our faith. So I would argue that the Bible provides us with seven insights on how we can work out our salvation. So if you've come to faith, you now need to work it out.

[00:16:36] What does this look like for me to follow Jesus in the everyday? I think there's seven things that I've spotted in Scripture. Friends, you may spot a few others that you'd like to chip in as well.

[00:16:46] And one of the things I'd recognize is the Bible talks about becoming born again. I do believe that being born again is something that happens when we come to faith. But I think being born again is something that also happens over time as we work out our faith.

[00:17:01] And each day when we choose to say yes to Jesus, we are being born a fresh. We're now living our lives differently as citizens of the kingdom of heaven rather than citizens of earth. And I think certainly for me, I came to faith.

[00:17:16] And then there was an is a continuing period of time of working out my salvation. Working out what does it look like to be somebody who loves and follows Jesus? So flipping us to 12, we do it with fear and trembling.

[00:17:31] It's said, don't they work out your faith with fear and trembling? I think this verse encourages us to pursue our salvation with the sense of awe and reverence for God. Asking seriously, and diligently, what do I now need to work out?

[00:17:47] Now when I say we fear and trembling, I don't mean about being scared of God in any way. It's like it is this deep reverence for wanting to make sure that we get it right. Make sure you take it seriously.

[00:18:02] I think Paul is saying in Philippians, make sure now you come to faith. Take it serious that you're going to need to make some changes in your life. So do it with seriousness. And so how do we work out, working out our salvation? We do it with seriousness.

[00:18:21] The second thing I think comes from one Peter one five to nine. And then it talks about our genuine faith is tested by trials, so that you produce as peer to variance, providing itself to result in praise and glory when Christ returns. Percevereing shows our salvation is real.

[00:18:44] I think there's something about pressing in how do we work out Jesus in the everyday? We do it by pressing on even when the tough seasons come. Keep on going. And it is in this perseverance that is like, our lives are proven, our lives are built up.

[00:19:05] And through the difficult trials we become stronger in the faith that we are living out. Three, I think we worked this out through our beading into Jesus' teaching and his wisdom.

[00:19:21] He was five nine talks about how Jesus became the source of eternal life for all who are they him. Obeegien's friends is God's commands. Obeegien's to God's commands demonstrates our salvation is active, living it out by being Obeegien's Jesus.

[00:19:39] Taking what Jesus says seriously, taking his wisdom seriously in implementing it into our lives into our everyday. When we feel like Jesus just doesn't seem to be helping me, we have to recognise that Jesus is already given as everything that we need to succeed.

[00:19:55] His wisdom is already found in the book. And if we were to only turn to the book then we would find true wisdom. We're talking to a young girl at just the other day, I was speaking at a church and we were talking about how difficult life was.

[00:20:11] And I was asking her about the things that happened, she told me. You know who coached you in how to make some good decisions in that situation. And she talked about how she's been reading Cosmopolitan magazine and how the magazine had this article.

[00:20:27] A number of articles from a number of women talking about how they navigated these particular kinds of issues. And I had to say to her, I'm really sorry. I think what you are saying to me is really quite foolish.

[00:20:41] The things that these three women in this article you're telling me about upset, I don't, I think that's made them feel better about their lives or they feel better about themselves.

[00:20:50] But I don't think what they're doing is real wisdom and friends we have to obey Obeegien to Jesus' teaching and Jesus' wisdom. Life is difficult, but it's going to be even more difficult if we're relying on our own wisdom and not on Jesus' wisdom.

[00:21:08] So where is Jesus when we need His help? Well, he is obviously there by the work of the Holy Spirit. But he is there in the Word. He's taught us, he's told us how to live.

[00:21:18] And therefore if we don't live by what he teaches us then it's always going to mean that our lives are not in sync with what he wants. So how do we work out our faith?

[00:21:31] We do it with fear and trembling, we do it with perseverance, we do it by being our beige integer Jesus. And we do it by number four producing fruits, you know, Ephesian, so Philippians 1, and I'm telling the talk about the fruit.

[00:21:45] Friends, we work out our faith by increasing in love, knowledge, righteousness. These are hours to prove and work out our salvation with bearing fruit that's good fruit empowered by God. How do we work out our faith? We do it by producing fruitfulness.

[00:22:07] And the scriptures talk about the work of the Holy Spirit in us, bearing fruit. So if you aren't remaining in the Holy Spirit and choosing to bear fruit then you are going to make decisions that you're going to look like,

[00:22:22] Gosh, where they really the wisest decisions. So fear and trembling perseverance through obedience by producing fruit. I've said here number five through sanctification. What is sanctification? Well, scripture talks about how we work out our salvation. And this working it out means through a process of being sanctified.

[00:22:44] The only other way that I could say that is by through the process of being made holy. Well, how do we get to be made holy? We do it by choosing better choices. We do it by listening to what Jesus has to say.

[00:22:59] Doing what he has to say in our lives, choosing not the foolish things, but the godly things, making sometimes those difficult decisions. And through this process we start to grow in holiness. We start to grow in righteousness.

[00:23:14] And because of that, we start then to resist the sinful things. So why is my life so difficult? Jesus doesn't seem to help me, the question is, But actually how many times have we just not chosen to do the right things?

[00:23:31] We've chosen to do the foolish things. And now we're living with the consequences of it. Rather than choosing to do the right things, the right things that he tells us. And then once we've chosen to do the right things, we start to grow in holiness.

[00:23:45] And through that friends, we then start to resist the things that we need to resist. Drunkenness, glutney, sexual immorality, foul talk. We start to resist that stuff because it's not a who we are anymore.

[00:23:59] Because we've been in the process of being sanctified to this salvation and then there's sanctification. Big words, salvation is the freedom we found in Jesus. And then the other is this process of being made holy by, yes, god but also better choices that we are living.

[00:24:20] And then the sixth thing is here, it is about, we talked about perseverance already, but by enduring to the end. I think one of the ways that we see our lives lived closer to Jesus is through choosing to endure this right to the end.

[00:24:37] Jesus taught that the one who perseveres the remains faithful to the end will be saved. Persistence shows true salvation.

[00:24:47] So one of the things you could notice is that if your salvation, you know, you're saved by Jesus, but you just keep constantly going back to this foolish thing over and over again. You're not learning from past experience.

[00:25:03] Well we have to then say to ourselves well are we actually saved or are we just religious people? How are we people who are trying to be religious but we're not actually being set free?

[00:25:14] So I keep going back to these old things because I'm not actually set free by them. So enduring to the end, being persevering for the long haul is one of the ways that we work out our salvation over the long haul.

[00:25:32] So friends, why is my life so difficult? Jesus doesn't seem to help me. Well sometimes it's because our perspective is wrong and that struggles are not going to go away but actually what Jesus has come to do with us is to stop us from being alienated with God.

[00:25:50] And once he stopped us from being alienated with God, then he wants to work in our lives so that we do make better decisions, better choices. And then when we find ourselves going well why am I still struggling? Why am I still sinning?

[00:26:01] There is a question for us are we actually implementing the teachings and the ideas that Jesus gives us that will help us walk that path.

[00:26:13] So I thought it would be how do we work out our salvation? We do it through a fear and crumbling, we do it by persevering in faith.

[00:26:22] Who are the ideas to Jesus as teaching and his wisdom not the world who is with them but are choosing to be fruitful with Jesus as things through the process of sanctification or becoming more holy,

[00:26:37] choosing to live the out things that Jesus says and then number six, by enduring to the very end deciding that we are going to commit to this way of life and not deviate from it.

[00:26:50] So that's how I would talk about why is my life so difficult? You may need to look at why, why is it difficult? Is it something you're doing, that somebody else is doing?

[00:27:01] Are you just surrounded by people like magnet, you're just drawing on clear, unwise ideas around you like a magnet? You know what, why is it that these things keep happening and then are you working out your faith?

[00:27:20] Seriously, by making the changes that you are going to need to make so you are walking in step with him. Friends, I pray that that is helpful and it equipped you for the week ahead and certainly gives you some questions ask yourself for the week ahead.

[00:27:34] So friends until next time, grace and peace and we'll catch up soon.