WSL West Coast Conference 2023 - Rosemary Cady - Creating and Sustaining Ministry Culture

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[00:00:12] Hi and welcome to When She Leads, a podcast for women in ministry. In this episode, we are releasing one of our breakout sessions from our 2023 Equipped for a Purpose conference. I pray it encourages you.

[00:00:28] This is a workshop on church culture. And at the When She Leads conference, we're here to equip leaders. So at this workshop, we'll be talking about what that means, church culture, how you can create one, and even how you can change one and even why this is important.

[00:00:46] So a gospel culture, it humbles us because we are sinners saved by grace. And it also emboldens us because we are loved completely.

[00:00:56] So just thinking about culture, I want to ask a question that when you have a restaurant to pick and you're going out to dinner, what are the reasons you choose that restaurant?

[00:01:09] Why do you want to go there? What are the reasons you like it there? Is it the customer service? Is it the price, the view? Is it the atmosphere, the music they play? Are they family friendly?

[00:01:22] So what is it about that place that makes you want to go there? And how do you feel when you are there?

[00:01:30] Another thing about culture, I lived on the foreign mission field in Hungary for a long time.

[00:01:37] I served there as a missionary and it was important that I learned the culture in Hungary.

[00:01:42] So culture is made up of lots of things. It's not just the language and being able to understand people and communicate.

[00:01:50] It's also little innuendos, the way people act, their gestures. It's learning things of their values, what is important to them, and learning how they think.

[00:02:04] So I have a quote here from the Center for Advanced Research on Language Acquisition.

[00:02:10] It defines culture as shared patterns of behaviors and interactions, cognitive constructs, and understanding that are learned by socialization.

[00:02:21] Thus, culture can be seen as the growth of a group identity fostered by social patterns unique to the group.

[00:02:28] So what the heck? That was really a mouthful, right? So let's break this down.

[00:02:34] It's patterns, patterns of behaviors and interactions, the way people think and understand things.

[00:02:42] And the way a group would learn this is by socialization. You've got to be around each other.

[00:02:48] And truly, I learned that in Hungary. The people there, they showed me how to put on a scarf, how to dress in the winter.

[00:02:55] They showed me how to walk down the sidewalk when it's icy. These are basic things. It's not really culture, but just the language was important that I learned.

[00:03:06] What they eat and when to eat those things was also important.

[00:03:11] You know, for Hungarians, they eat hot dogs for breakfast, so that was different.

[00:03:16] So just all these little things matter to them.

[00:03:19] How they do things is learned by socialization.

[00:03:22] And truly, understanding what they value was really a key in wanting to do ministry to them.

[00:03:29] And getting into their lives, being involved with them, was really important then that I do learn their language.

[00:03:39] And I learned what their behaviors mean.

[00:03:41] I learn how to interact with them.

[00:03:45] And all of that was important to me when I was a missionary.

[00:03:49] And then we have this definition that talked about a group identity.

[00:03:53] And truly, Hungarians had a unique group identity.

[00:03:57] And what I want to bring out today is to talk about how we, as the Christian church, have a group identity.

[00:04:05] So think about cultures.

[00:04:08] You know, we have countries like India, which has a rich culture.

[00:04:13] We think about their customs, their music, their food, their art.

[00:04:19] All of these things make up their culture.

[00:04:22] And it's rich.

[00:04:23] We can really identify what would be Indian by looking at those things or listening to them.

[00:04:28] And so a few ways to talk about church culture are these.

[00:04:34] Gospel culture is a reflection of the kingdom culture we learn from Jesus in our Bibles.

[00:04:41] And a real basic way to break this down, I love this.

[00:04:45] Church culture was defined like this by my husband two years ago at the CGN conference.

[00:04:50] He said, it means the way things are done around here.

[00:04:55] Now that is really simplifying it.

[00:04:57] And I like that.

[00:04:58] So what we specifically want in our church culture is a gospel culture.

[00:05:05] We are defined by the gospel.

[00:05:09] And here, looking in our Bibles, Sermon on the Mount, Jesus is talking in Matthew 5 through 7,

[00:05:16] describing the kind of people he wants us to be, the kind of lives we should be living.

[00:05:24] And when we get into that and read about what he says, it is very attractive.

[00:05:30] In Matthew 5, 44, he says that you should love your enemy and pray for those who persecute you.

[00:05:36] Imagine, isn't that a place that you would like to be where someone who doesn't even like you prays for you?

[00:05:42] I want to go there and I want to be around people like that.

[00:05:46] And, you know, what Jesus describes in this Sermon on the Mount, it is a high calling.

[00:05:52] But think of how beautiful it is when Christians live the way that the Bible describes for us to live.

[00:06:01] People want to go to a church then that makes them feel good.

[00:06:06] And those feelings then are the culture in that church.

[00:06:11] And people want to go to a church that makes them feel good.

[00:06:17] Now, values are something we hold up as important.

[00:06:23] And in talking about gospel culture, I want to talk a lot about values.

[00:06:28] So Ray Ortlund describes gospel culture as this.

[00:06:32] The vertical glories of the gospel come down upon us in a church will spread out horizontally to the church.

[00:06:41] And we've heard this expression before where it's like vertically between us and God, what happens and what we experience,

[00:06:50] we spread out to the people around us horizontally, those around us in the church.

[00:06:56] And so a church culture is those things that are just hard to define.

[00:07:01] It's the vibe there, the tone and all these little things, the way people talk to one another,

[00:07:07] the way people engage with one another, how people treat one another,

[00:07:11] all is together collectively the culture of a church.

[00:07:17] And so gospel doctrine creates your culture.

[00:07:20] And it really should.

[00:07:22] As Christian churches and here in Calvary Chapel, we uphold the gospel,

[00:07:26] the good news of Jesus Christ, his redemption of us.

[00:07:30] And what we do really is a reflection then of that teaching, that Bible teaching.

[00:07:39] So the two go hand in hand.

[00:07:42] Gospel doctrine creates your culture.

[00:07:45] What you teach affects what you do.

[00:07:48] So your church reflects its doctrine, not in what is said, but in what is done.

[00:07:53] And in the way that we treat one another.

[00:07:56] I believe this is so important.

[00:07:58] It is about the way people feel when they come into our churches.

[00:08:04] We should be gentle with one another, not harsh.

[00:08:08] What about those facial expressions?

[00:08:10] Are you happy to see one another?

[00:08:12] Are you happy to be here?

[00:08:13] Those facial expressions will show that.

[00:08:16] And it is that kind of environment that attracts people.

[00:08:20] It's about the way they feel when they are at your church.

[00:08:26] So let's talk then about the values in the world.

[00:08:29] And these are the ones you don't want to emulate and bring into your church.

[00:08:32] There's the world is constantly changing what's important,

[00:08:36] but it's about being successful according to the world and whatever that could be.

[00:08:41] Numbers, big churches, lots of money.

[00:08:44] I don't even know.

[00:08:45] But if we try to emulate what the world says are values, we're going to get lost.

[00:08:51] It's about being insta-famous, constantly busy, and these kinds of ideals.

[00:08:57] But that is not what we want to emulate.

[00:08:59] We want to dig into our Bibles and see what is valued there

[00:09:03] and what Jesus tells us is important.

[00:09:07] So if you feel like in your ministry, in your church,

[00:09:12] that you might have lost your way and maybe your values are not truly how you feel they should be,

[00:09:21] then you can change them.

[00:09:23] Maybe your values are hard to distinct from what's out in the world,

[00:09:29] that people there are wanting to just come to a church to be a place that's successful,

[00:09:35] busy with lots of things happening.

[00:09:39] People want to be popular, insta-famous, this whole idea in a church.

[00:09:44] If you are at that place and you say, no, I don't want this,

[00:09:48] we're going to talk at the end about how you can change that culture.

[00:09:51] And really, we should be thinking about this,

[00:09:53] that we should be resisting the pressures of the world's ideas of values.

[00:09:59] We shouldn't copy those cultures.

[00:10:02] We should also do this.

[00:10:04] We should remember that we are Christians living in a host culture.

[00:10:08] This is not our home.

[00:10:09] But this is where we live right now.

[00:10:11] And we are to remember that, that we are not home yet.

[00:10:15] And I think another thing that's important in not copying the culture and the values in the world

[00:10:21] is that we are to remember that our identity is in Christ,

[00:10:26] not in the world,

[00:10:27] not in what we might receive from the world,

[00:10:30] not in being successful,

[00:10:32] and not in these things.

[00:10:33] So let's talk instead about some values that we should be looking for.

[00:10:38] So these are just a bunch of examples,

[00:10:41] because truly I believe every church should think about these for themselves.

[00:10:46] And what is valued in a church?

[00:10:48] I think number one is the people.

[00:10:50] The people.

[00:10:51] That is why we are here.

[00:10:52] We are a gathering,

[00:10:54] a family of believers.

[00:10:55] We have these relationships at church,

[00:10:58] and that is why we come here.

[00:11:00] We want to belong somewhere,

[00:11:02] and we want to be in the body of Christ.

[00:11:05] The people are important.

[00:11:08] So another note about that,

[00:11:10] about values,

[00:11:12] is that I'm going to encourage you as leaders

[00:11:15] that you need to invest in your people.

[00:11:18] You need to invest first and foremost in your leaders

[00:11:21] and those who help in your ministry.

[00:11:24] And from them,

[00:11:25] it spreads out.

[00:11:27] You need to spend time knowing your people.

[00:11:30] They will be happier to work with you

[00:11:33] when they see that you care about them.

[00:11:35] Some other values that can be in our churches.

[00:11:39] We might value growth.

[00:11:41] Like we want our church to just grow.

[00:11:44] We want more non-believers coming here and getting saved.

[00:11:46] So if we value growth,

[00:11:48] we might take risks.

[00:11:50] We might try something.

[00:11:52] We might do something new.

[00:11:54] So in our church,

[00:11:56] I know that we value excellence.

[00:11:59] We want things done well.

[00:12:01] We invest in getting it done

[00:12:04] with a good quality,

[00:12:06] high standards,

[00:12:07] and done well.

[00:12:09] Another thing about our church,

[00:12:11] where I'm at,

[00:12:12] is that we value loyalty.

[00:12:14] We,

[00:12:15] and these are like staff values

[00:12:18] and just values that the staff would emulate.

[00:12:20] But in being loyal,

[00:12:22] that means you don't throw people under the bus.

[00:12:24] We also value something interesting.

[00:12:27] I don't know what you think,

[00:12:28] but we value a sense of humor.

[00:12:30] We like that around here.

[00:12:31] That means you can laugh at yourself.

[00:12:33] That means that you don't take yourself overly seriously.

[00:12:37] Another value that I can just suggest,

[00:12:39] we talk to each other

[00:12:41] and not about each other.

[00:12:45] So maybe in your church,

[00:12:48] you feel like what you value

[00:12:51] is that we just need this church to survive.

[00:12:54] We want to get through.

[00:12:55] We want to see this church go on.

[00:12:57] And if the value of that church is survival,

[00:13:00] that would mean you don't take risks.

[00:13:02] And you really kind of hunker down

[00:13:04] and focus on the people that are there,

[00:13:06] the people that you have.

[00:13:08] Maybe if church tradition is valued saying,

[00:13:12] this is who we are,

[00:13:13] this is who we've always been,

[00:13:15] then you focus on the past.

[00:13:17] You're going to talk about what was done before,

[00:13:19] who was there before,

[00:13:21] and that is showing that church tradition

[00:13:24] is what you value.

[00:13:27] So in communicating these values,

[00:13:31] that is so important.

[00:13:32] You can know what is important to you,

[00:13:34] but how's everyone else going to know?

[00:13:36] So you really need to learn how to communicate them.

[00:13:40] And there are two ways to communicate your values

[00:13:42] that I'll talk about,

[00:13:43] the pulpit and the people.

[00:13:46] So you need to say what you value.

[00:13:49] You need to say to your leaders,

[00:13:51] say it to them,

[00:13:52] explain it to them,

[00:13:53] and make sure they understand.

[00:13:55] Because those leaders,

[00:13:57] secondly,

[00:13:57] will show it by example.

[00:14:00] The character of the leaders

[00:14:02] communicate the priorities of the church.

[00:14:05] And I'm not going to get into 1 Timothy 3 right now,

[00:14:08] because there it's describing the character of the leader,

[00:14:11] of the pastor of the church.

[00:14:13] And that's something that you need to think about

[00:14:17] when you're choosing leaders and raising them up.

[00:14:20] The character of the leader.

[00:14:22] 1 Timothy 3.15 says that Paul is concerned

[00:14:25] how the leader conducts himself in the household of God,

[00:14:29] and that is why he wrote that letter.

[00:14:31] So the culture, remember,

[00:14:35] they are things communicated in even innuendos

[00:14:38] and without words.

[00:14:39] It's things like your facial expression,

[00:14:42] how you relate to the people,

[00:14:44] what you honor,

[00:14:46] what you hold as important.

[00:14:49] And remember,

[00:14:50] Jesus is our example.

[00:14:54] Jesus is truly the one that we should be emulating.

[00:14:57] There's so much to say about the character of Jesus,

[00:14:59] but this is one that I love

[00:15:00] that talks about him being humble and gentle.

[00:15:05] Matthew 11.29,

[00:15:07] he says,

[00:15:07] learn from me because I am gentle and humble in heart.

[00:15:12] And the leader should be that living example

[00:15:14] of Christ-like leadership.

[00:15:17] So third,

[00:15:19] our job as leaders is to cultivate an environment.

[00:15:23] We are to create and make this environment

[00:15:27] that helps people unlearn ungodly characteristics.

[00:15:33] And that environment,

[00:15:34] then if we're going to unlearn things,

[00:15:36] then we should be learning and replacing it.

[00:15:40] Like not just saying,

[00:15:41] don't do this,

[00:15:42] but we should say instead of that,

[00:15:43] don't do that,

[00:15:44] do this instead.

[00:15:45] And a church,

[00:15:46] then it's like a greenhouse

[00:15:47] where people can come and grow in a healthy way.

[00:15:53] Um,

[00:15:54] so I want to look at Colossians chapter three.

[00:15:59] And when we're talking about this,

[00:16:00] what we unlearn,

[00:16:02] let's read Colossians three,

[00:16:03] five.

[00:16:04] So put to death,

[00:16:06] whatever in your nature belongs to the earth,

[00:16:09] sexual immorality,

[00:16:10] impurity,

[00:16:12] shameful passion,

[00:16:13] evil desire,

[00:16:14] and greed,

[00:16:15] which is idolatry.

[00:16:17] And then we'll go to verse eight,

[00:16:20] but now put off all such things as anger,

[00:16:24] rage,

[00:16:25] malice,

[00:16:25] slander,

[00:16:26] abusive language from your mouth.

[00:16:28] Do not lie to one another,

[00:16:30] since you have put off the old man with its practices

[00:16:33] and have been clothed with the new man

[00:16:36] that is being renewed in knowledge,

[00:16:38] according to the image of the one who created it.

[00:16:41] Here,

[00:16:42] there is neither Greek nor Jew,

[00:16:45] circumcised nor uncircumcised,

[00:16:47] barbarian,

[00:16:48] Scythian,

[00:16:48] slaves are free,

[00:16:49] but Christ is all and in all.

[00:16:52] And there we see what our church should be like,

[00:16:56] like a greenhouse where people can come in

[00:16:57] and take off those things that don't belong

[00:17:00] and put on the nature of Christ.

[00:17:04] And our job as leaders is to cultivate that environment

[00:17:07] that encourages that kind of growth.

[00:17:11] So our actions,

[00:17:12] fourth,

[00:17:13] our actions also communicate our,

[00:17:16] our church values.

[00:17:19] So our actions tell what we value.

[00:17:22] For example,

[00:17:24] if we're really worried about the building,

[00:17:26] we might run around and say,

[00:17:28] ah,

[00:17:28] you know,

[00:17:29] don't spill that.

[00:17:30] Oh no,

[00:17:30] look at this mess over here,

[00:17:32] this or that.

[00:17:32] And we're worried about the building.

[00:17:34] And that might show in how we are behaving about the building

[00:17:38] and are being overly worried about it.

[00:17:41] Another thing about our actions could be that we show that,

[00:17:46] um,

[00:17:47] growth is important because we're trying things.

[00:17:50] We're trying to reach people.

[00:17:51] We're actively doing things in the community,

[00:17:54] reaching the community and showing them who we are.

[00:17:57] We're visible in our community.

[00:18:01] And maybe another thing,

[00:18:03] our actions,

[00:18:04] it's definitely important.

[00:18:05] Our actions amongst the church people.

[00:18:08] Um,

[00:18:08] what if we get as a leader an email and what if we say,

[00:18:12] oh,

[00:18:12] I don't have time for that.

[00:18:13] Oh,

[00:18:13] that's not important.

[00:18:14] I don't need to respond to that.

[00:18:15] And I think that communicates that people are not that important to you.

[00:18:20] Um,

[00:18:20] little things like returning an email or listening to people when they want to

[00:18:25] talk to you are important because you say people matter around here and that's

[00:18:29] a value that we uphold.

[00:18:31] So your actions are really important to communicate your values.

[00:18:38] So Craig Groeschel has a podcast.

[00:18:41] Um,

[00:18:41] he's,

[00:18:42] he's,

[00:18:43] um,

[00:18:43] a great church leader and he talks a lot about variety of things,

[00:18:48] but one that I got from him is he defines a church culture and he says,

[00:18:53] culture is what you create and what you allow.

[00:18:56] So very interesting.

[00:18:58] He's right.

[00:18:59] Two parts go with culture,

[00:19:01] what you create and what you allow in your church.

[00:19:05] As a leader,

[00:19:06] you create that environment.

[00:19:07] Like we were talking about that.

[00:19:08] It's kind of like a greenhouse where people can come and grow.

[00:19:12] It's a healthy place.

[00:19:14] You hope,

[00:19:15] and you want it to be a healthy place.

[00:19:18] So people do not want to go to a church with a bad culture where they are not

[00:19:23] treated well.

[00:19:25] And don't be that place.

[00:19:28] So,

[00:19:28] um,

[00:19:30] what we do not want to allow,

[00:19:32] for example,

[00:19:33] are things like toxic people.

[00:19:35] I don't know if you know about those kinds of people,

[00:19:37] but I've met some.

[00:19:39] And what you,

[00:19:40] what Craig Groeschel is talking about is that a culture is what you create and

[00:19:45] what you allow.

[00:19:45] If in your church,

[00:19:49] toxic people have been allowed to come into leadership.

[00:19:52] I really think that needs to be changed.

[00:19:55] Toxic people just spread their toxicity and spread negativity and just a bad

[00:20:00] culture.

[00:20:01] And it's a hurtful place to be.

[00:20:02] I don't know if you've ever served in a place like that,

[00:20:04] but it is not fun.

[00:20:06] And here I have a quote from Carrie Newhoff.

[00:20:10] Every day,

[00:20:10] gifted leaders quit toxic cultures,

[00:20:14] toxic leaders,

[00:20:15] and they leave toxic workplaces.

[00:20:17] And every day,

[00:20:18] amazing churches miss their mission because someone allowed toxic leaders to

[00:20:23] sabotage the work.

[00:20:24] And every day,

[00:20:25] good people go home discouraged and defeated because no one had the guts to

[00:20:30] deal with the toxic people.

[00:20:32] So learn to spot those toxic people.

[00:20:36] Be a leader then who protects your culture and who protects your team and those

[00:20:43] who serve with you.

[00:20:44] Protect them from these toxic people.

[00:20:47] And a few words about toxic people.

[00:20:50] They're self-absorbed.

[00:20:52] They don't accept correction.

[00:20:54] They lie,

[00:20:55] manipulate.

[00:20:55] They don't listen.

[00:20:57] They blame others and they are never wrong.

[00:20:59] They play the victim.

[00:21:01] They're frequently angry.

[00:21:03] They have hidden agendas,

[00:21:05] a critical spirit.

[00:21:07] They are gossips.

[00:21:08] They talk maliciously.

[00:21:10] They are passive aggressive,

[00:21:12] et cetera.

[00:21:12] Have you ever met anyone like that?

[00:21:14] It's very difficult to have someone like that in leadership.

[00:21:19] And a healthy leader then should not allow them into leadership.

[00:21:24] And this is what a leader needs to do to create a deeply healthy culture.

[00:21:31] Do not allow in these things like gossip,

[00:21:34] malicious talk.

[00:21:36] Shut down the criticism.

[00:21:38] Put out that anger.

[00:21:40] Don't let it take up a lot of space in meetings and in time and in running events or Bible studies.

[00:21:48] Don't give space to those things.

[00:21:50] And eventually, over time, toxic people will leave.

[00:21:55] Make sure you have healthy leaders who work with you.

[00:21:58] And make sure that you protect them and you have their back.

[00:22:03] Another person who has a book, Ray Ortlund on gospel culture.

[00:22:10] He said this book is very interesting.

[00:22:13] It's called You're Not Crazy.

[00:22:14] So that's a good title.

[00:22:15] Talking about establishing a church culture.

[00:22:17] He talks about how gospel doctrine creates gospel culture.

[00:22:22] And this, I think, is really foundational, really important.

[00:22:26] He says that you can be correct in your Bible teaching.

[00:22:29] You can be spot on with your doctrine.

[00:22:32] And you can be completely off with your culture.

[00:22:37] So with your words, you can teach doctrine really well.

[00:22:42] And people will know the gospel in their heads.

[00:22:46] But their actions will not be showing what they believe.

[00:22:52] So a leader might emphasize doctrine.

[00:22:55] But be mistaken in their relational, in their relationships in the church.

[00:23:02] They might be saying the right things, but behaving the wrong way.

[00:23:07] So what I'm saying is that these two things go hand in hand.

[00:23:12] If you want to have a gospel culture in your church, you teach the Bible.

[00:23:19] You teach gospel doctrine.

[00:23:21] And in your relationships, you act out a gospel culture.

[00:23:28] It's important.

[00:23:30] So we can't just, in our heads, know our faith.

[00:23:34] But by our actions, dismiss what we believe.

[00:23:39] So I think James chapter 2 talks about this.

[00:23:42] And that chapter, it talks about faith and works go together.

[00:23:46] And how true that is.

[00:23:48] So in our church cultures, we want to be correct with what our teachings are.

[00:23:55] But we also need to be and should be correct by our actions.

[00:23:59] So in our churches, a few things I want to say about this.

[00:24:04] We want our church to be where sinners are welcome, don't we?

[00:24:08] We're not a club here of cleaned up people who have it all together.

[00:24:12] I would say the opposite, that we need to be a place where everyone is welcome.

[00:24:19] Sinners should always be welcome into our churches.

[00:24:21] Our doors should be open to that.

[00:24:23] And you know, I'll just say a word about who we are as Calvary Chapel.

[00:24:27] That our churches began, as you know, and there was the Jesus revolution made about this,

[00:24:33] that hippies came in.

[00:24:34] They came in as they were, hippies.

[00:24:37] And they were hungry for Jesus.

[00:24:39] They were hungry for real love.

[00:24:41] And they were welcomed into our Calvary chapels.

[00:24:45] But, you know, a lot of us forget that.

[00:24:48] We think that we, that was us in the past.

[00:24:51] And now we've matured and grown up.

[00:24:53] We've cleaned up our lives.

[00:24:55] We've done quite well for ourselves.

[00:24:57] And now this is who we are at our churches.

[00:24:59] And when sinners come in, we might be scared of them.

[00:25:02] And I find that to be very sad.

[00:25:04] A sad place that we've gotten to.

[00:25:07] We should remember who we are.

[00:25:09] And we should be a place that welcomes sinners.

[00:25:12] We should remember that Jesus is a friend of sinners.

[00:25:16] Jesus is big enough to handle sinners, isn't he?

[00:25:21] Let's look at Mark 2.13.

[00:25:32] Okay, Mark 2.13.

[00:25:34] Jesus went out again by the sea.

[00:25:36] The whole crowd came to him and he taught them.

[00:25:39] As he went along, he saw Levi, the son of Alphaeus, sitting at the tax booth.

[00:25:44] Follow me, he said to him.

[00:25:47] And he got up and followed him.

[00:25:48] As Jesus was having a meal in Levi's home, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with Jesus and his disciples.

[00:25:55] For there were many who followed him.

[00:25:58] When the experts in the law and the Pharisees saw that he was eating with sinners and tax collectors, they said to his disciples,

[00:26:05] Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?

[00:26:09] When Jesus heard this, he said to them,

[00:26:12] Those who are healthy don't need a physician, but those who are sick do.

[00:26:18] I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.

[00:26:21] And there, there we see that Jesus wants to be around sinners.

[00:26:27] And it even says many sinners were there.

[00:26:29] Many came to eat with him.

[00:26:31] And I love that.

[00:26:32] I love how Jesus is not afraid of sinners.

[00:26:35] He is big enough to handle them.

[00:26:38] And he welcomes them.

[00:26:39] He said,

[00:26:40] They are the reason I am here.

[00:26:41] The ones who know they need me.

[00:26:43] The ones who know they are sick.

[00:26:45] The ones who know that they have a need.

[00:26:49] And so Jesus is showing us the people that he wants to spend time with.

[00:26:54] And shouldn't we want that as well?

[00:26:56] Don't be afraid of sinners.

[00:26:58] Open your arms like Jesus did and welcome them.

[00:27:01] They should be welcome here.

[00:27:02] And in your church culture, you shouldn't be a group that is afraid when sinners come in your door.

[00:27:10] Like people who don't know the Lord.

[00:27:11] You should be welcoming them.

[00:27:13] We're so happy you're here.

[00:27:15] We're glad you're here.

[00:27:15] And maybe not overdoing it to scare them away.

[00:27:18] But just, we're glad you're here.

[00:27:20] Welcome.

[00:27:20] Come on in.

[00:27:21] Listen.

[00:27:22] And that is what the love of Christ does.

[00:27:26] It is big enough to handle anyone.

[00:27:29] Anyone is welcome into our churches.

[00:27:31] Anyone is welcome in a gospel culture.

[00:27:36] So Jesus knows that he is the cure.

[00:27:39] And that they need him.

[00:27:41] And we are people who know also that we have the answer and the cure for sin.

[00:27:48] And we should want to help people.

[00:27:50] And that should be a big note in our churches.

[00:27:54] That this is so important.

[00:27:56] Another way that we treat people is in the way that we teach.

[00:28:01] So we welcome in anyone who is wanting to come into our church doors.

[00:28:06] But also the way we communicate with people is so important.

[00:28:10] Can you hear the difference when I'm talking and using a tone like this?

[00:28:16] Or if I say, what's wrong with you?

[00:28:18] And you need to be doing this.

[00:28:20] And these things you should be trying harder.

[00:28:23] Do it better.

[00:28:24] Try harder.

[00:28:24] Do it right next time.

[00:28:26] And what's wrong with you people here?

[00:28:28] You know, I don't know.

[00:28:29] I can't do it that well.

[00:28:30] But you can hear the difference in the tone.

[00:28:32] I think the tone is so important in your church.

[00:28:35] When you are talking to your church people, do you condemn them?

[00:28:39] Do you criticize them?

[00:28:41] Do you make them feel bad for not doing enough?

[00:28:44] And let me give you just a couple words here.

[00:28:46] That it's so important the way people feel when they come to your church.

[00:28:50] Do they come to church because they need a good beating up?

[00:28:53] Or do they come to church because it's like a hospital for the sick?

[00:28:56] Don't they get beat up enough throughout the week at their jobs?

[00:28:59] Their boss might tell them that they mess up.

[00:29:02] They're not good enough.

[00:29:03] They don't work hard enough.

[00:29:04] What they do is bad work.

[00:29:06] And they might be harshly treated somewhere else in their home.

[00:29:10] They might be yelled at.

[00:29:12] They might be dealing with angry people.

[00:29:15] Why should they come to your church and have this representation of the gospel taught to them

[00:29:22] in a tone that's angry or harsh or disappointed with them and their performance?

[00:29:27] That is definitely something we need to consider in our church culture.

[00:29:31] The way we talk to people.

[00:29:33] The tone.

[00:29:34] You are not to be someone who's beating them up.

[00:29:37] You're to remember that you're a hospital for the sick.

[00:29:40] And your people get beat up enough.

[00:29:42] They have struggle enough out in the world.

[00:29:44] Why should the church be like that too?

[00:29:46] So another way, another thing that is so important about gospel doctrine going together with gospel

[00:29:57] culture is this.

[00:29:58] When we talk about the Bible and when we get to these passages that talk about sinners,

[00:30:03] we don't say those sinners out there, the people outside our building, or you all sitting there

[00:30:11] and then you separate yourself as the speaker and you say, well, me, you know, well, I've got it all

[00:30:16] together and all of you sinners.

[00:30:18] But we change our speech when we teach the Bible to say us, us, sinners, sinners like me, sinners like

[00:30:28] us.

[00:30:29] And we learn to be the one who identifies.

[00:30:31] We don't set ourselves above our church people and above the others around us who do come in our

[00:30:38] building.

[00:30:38] We are all sinners saved by grace.

[00:30:40] And we should remember that.

[00:30:45] So the Bible teaching and the tone, I think, is so important.

[00:30:51] We want our church to be where people come and they are gospel dependent.

[00:30:58] We love our church people and we want them to come here and not just get beat up by us like

[00:31:05] a weekly beating, like go out now, do it better, work harder, do it right.

[00:31:09] But we want them to be gospel dependent, meaning more and more dependent upon the Lord.

[00:31:16] As they're coming to our churches, they can learn here that this is a hospital and we give

[00:31:22] you grace here.

[00:31:23] We give you love here.

[00:31:24] We give you Jesus here.

[00:31:25] Lean upon Jesus.

[00:31:27] He is the one that you need.

[00:31:28] And we teach our people to be gospel dependent, dependent upon God.

[00:31:35] So Ray Ortlund then, I'll quote him, so important.

[00:31:38] He says, a church can unsay by its culture what it says by its doctrine and not even realize it.

[00:31:46] Isn't that sad?

[00:31:47] This should be a community of grace.

[00:31:54] Our churches should have this kind of culture of grace.

[00:32:00] And we need to remember our beginnings as Calvary Chapel, that we were a church started by sinners

[00:32:06] and we are led by sinners and we continue to be a church which is a hospital and a home

[00:32:12] and a family for sinners saved by grace.

[00:32:15] Yes.

[00:32:17] So another thing to talk about with the tone and the way you treat these people is the last

[00:32:24] bit that I'll say about it.

[00:32:25] But it should be these kinds of expectations then that we put on church people.

[00:32:30] So a lot of times people struggle, you know, maybe there's a death in the family or an illness,

[00:32:36] something really heavy going on and they stay away.

[00:32:40] I know people who have stayed away from church during these difficult seasons and they say,

[00:32:45] oh, no, no, I can't come back yet because I haven't yet cleaned up my life enough or,

[00:32:51] you know, I don't think I can come and, you know, not cry or I can't be a strong enough

[00:32:57] Christian yet to go back to church.

[00:32:59] And I find that really sad because like we were just describing that a church should be

[00:33:05] a place that's known as a hospital for the sick, a place for the hurting, a place for

[00:33:11] those who are struggling and they should be welcome here.

[00:33:15] You don't have to fix up your life before you come into our doors.

[00:33:18] You should come here because you have need and we want to embrace you and pray for you and

[00:33:25] encourage you and just let you cry when you come in.

[00:33:28] It should not be a place where you come and you're stressed out because you need to perform.

[00:33:35] So I want to get to how to create a church gospel culture.

[00:33:44] First, and this one, this one's good.

[00:33:47] So have a church mission that everyone knows and that you can all work towards.

[00:33:53] And the way we did it here at our church is we made little, we printed up bookmarks that

[00:33:58] just write our church mission on it.

[00:34:00] And those are free for people to take.

[00:34:02] And it just basically says what your church is all about in one sentence.

[00:34:09] Second step would be, and that church mission would be something you want to work towards,

[00:34:15] that something you want to see your church as a whole accomplishing.

[00:34:20] So secondly, and this is fun, find out what you love and find out what you hate.

[00:34:26] Like you really passionately dislike some things at your church.

[00:34:29] Like you would say, oh my goodness, I really, I'm really hurt.

[00:34:34] I really dislike when people leave my building and no one ever talks to them or says hi to

[00:34:41] them.

[00:34:41] And they just left like that.

[00:34:45] And that could be then one of your values.

[00:34:50] Find out what you love.

[00:34:51] For example, you could say, I love when new people come in and they love to be here.

[00:34:56] That could be one of them.

[00:34:58] So maybe pick your top 10 or so and make your values based upon what you love and what you

[00:35:06] hate.

[00:35:07] Third, you need to establish some standards and expectations for those in leadership.

[00:35:14] So make sure those are high standards.

[00:35:17] Not like, you know, I don't know.

[00:35:20] One time I was a high school youth group leader and our expectations were don't watch rated R

[00:35:26] movies, don't smoke, don't drive an opposite member of the sex in your car and don't listen

[00:35:32] to non-Christian music in your car or something like this.

[00:35:35] And then I thought, yeah, okay, we can check those off the list.

[00:35:39] Like what I don't do, but what about, let's just not say, what am I supposed to not do?

[00:35:45] Like avoid and oh, you know, don't smoke, don't watch rated R movies.

[00:35:49] But what about some positive ones?

[00:35:53] Like be people who are already respected in the church community.

[00:35:59] Be people who already go around and show concern for your congregation, for the people in your

[00:36:07] church body, who are already praying for other people, talking to them, ministering to them.

[00:36:12] And maybe these should instead be the types of values you put out as your standards and

[00:36:19] expectations for leadership.

[00:36:24] So have the right team members.

[00:36:27] It's really important that you pick the right people to lead.

[00:36:30] And they will then express that culture.

[00:36:34] So you as the leader, you can work with a team to pick your values, your mission, your values.

[00:36:44] And then you need to communicate those to your leaders who also then communicate them to

[00:36:49] the people around them, the people that you all minister to.

[00:36:54] And these leaders then will need to own that culture.

[00:36:58] They will need to say, yep, I love those.

[00:37:01] And that's how we're doing this.

[00:37:02] And then they reflect that your church is a great place to be.

[00:37:08] So another thing is that when hiring, you want to base the hiring or choosing of your leaders

[00:37:15] based on these church values.

[00:37:18] And just think it through.

[00:37:20] Will this person reflect those values?

[00:37:23] Will they be able to, like if I say, if, you know, treating people the right way with

[00:37:30] kindness and humility is important, then make sure that that's a person who will do that.

[00:37:35] Do we work hard around here?

[00:37:37] And then you want to pick people who work hard around here.

[00:37:40] Is it someone who can laugh at themselves, who has a sense of humor?

[00:37:43] Is it someone who's flexible, someone who's teachable?

[00:37:47] And all of these are the things you should consider when picking your leadership

[00:37:52] or when you're hiring someone.

[00:37:54] So leaders then show the church's culture by example.

[00:38:01] And the movement then of what you want to accomplish in establishing a gospel culture

[00:38:07] is that it begins with the leaders, moves towards the community,

[00:38:11] and then it reaches out of your building into your city.

[00:38:16] And that's so important because then people start to say things like,

[00:38:19] oh yeah, that church over there, that's the place where you, you know,

[00:38:23] Calvary Chapel is really famous.

[00:38:24] You learn the Bible really well over there.

[00:38:27] That was one of the first things I learned about my local Calvary Chapel.

[00:38:30] You want to learn the Bible?

[00:38:32] That's where you go.

[00:38:33] They're really good at it.

[00:38:34] They have these long Bible studies people were saying,

[00:38:37] and they didn't even attend the church.

[00:38:38] People just knew that about that place.

[00:38:40] Oh, that church?

[00:38:41] Yeah, you should try going there because they welcome people.

[00:38:45] They're nice over there.

[00:38:47] And these are the things you want the people in the community to say about you

[00:38:51] because they know a bit about your church culture.

[00:38:55] Something interesting, what your church celebrates shows what it values.

[00:39:00] So I'll go back again to this thing when I was a high school leader.

[00:39:04] This was kind of an interesting one that I came to realize

[00:39:07] that we were celebrating kids that would graduate high school

[00:39:12] and move off to go to Bible college.

[00:39:13] And it was announced from the front,

[00:39:16] yay, so-and-so, they are going to Bible college.

[00:39:19] And everyone was like, oh, and they'd clap.

[00:39:21] But then the kids that were going off to like, you know,

[00:39:25] University of California, whatever town,

[00:39:29] it wasn't announced.

[00:39:30] It wasn't celebrated.

[00:39:32] And that's what I mean by that.

[00:39:34] What your church celebrates shows what it values.

[00:39:37] And so I came to feel really bad for those kids

[00:39:41] who had worked so hard in high school

[00:39:42] and got accepted into good secular colleges.

[00:39:46] We did not value that they were wanting to have jobs out in the community.

[00:39:52] And it just, it really hurt a lot of those kids.

[00:39:56] A lot of them were frustrated and left the church.

[00:39:59] No surprise there because what was important to them

[00:40:02] wasn't celebrated and we did not celebrate their achievements.

[00:40:06] Anyway, just going to say what you celebrate shows what you value.

[00:40:11] And another one is what you appreciate from the people in your church

[00:40:18] reflects what is important to you, what you value.

[00:40:23] And then that will set your culture.

[00:40:25] So how you let people behave.

[00:40:29] It's what you allow, as Craig Groeschel was talking about.

[00:40:32] So do you allow, I don't know, this one's a bit hard to think of examples,

[00:40:37] but how do you allow the church to talk to the pastor?

[00:40:42] Like around here we say Pastor Nick.

[00:40:45] And I like that.

[00:40:46] I like because he is the pastor and he should be given proper respect.

[00:40:50] But more than that, like, oh, pastor, oh, and you know,

[00:40:55] these kinds of extra like oohs and ahs for the pastor, I think is not helpful.

[00:41:00] It's not necessary.

[00:41:01] And it's not really even what he wants.

[00:41:04] I remember Pastor Chuck was also like this.

[00:41:08] He just didn't like a lot of attention and didn't want people giving him,

[00:41:14] I don't know, extra oohs and ahs.

[00:41:16] He came to visit Hungary once, Pastor Chuck Smith.

[00:41:19] And when he entered the room, there was like, oh, he's here.

[00:41:23] And there was like a gasp.

[00:41:24] He's in the room.

[00:41:25] You know, everyone had heard about Pastor Chuck Smith.

[00:41:27] And we were like a grandchild church in Hungary.

[00:41:31] And we had a conference and Pastor Chuck came.

[00:41:34] And it was so deeply meaningful to those people to see Pastor Chuck.

[00:41:38] But he just smiled and just taught the Bible.

[00:41:44] And the feeling would be this, that he didn't really allow everyone to go on and on adoring him or extra this and that and that to lift him up.

[00:41:54] And I think that that shows what you appreciate from the people in your church will then reflect what is important.

[00:42:02] It reflects what you value.

[00:42:03] So what you allow and how you let people show that kind of appreciation, I think, sets the culture in your church.

[00:42:13] So you might say, oh, this is great, good.

[00:42:16] But, you know, I guess I stepped into a church or, you know, we've allowed some toxic people or some problems to come in.

[00:42:25] How do we change the culture?

[00:42:27] How to change the culture is hard.

[00:42:30] It does take a long time, but you can do it.

[00:42:33] And what you need to realize is that not everyone on your team and your leadership can do that change with you.

[00:42:42] They might not know how to do a change.

[00:42:44] And you need to consider each person as an individual then.

[00:42:49] First, I would suggest that you change your values, just like we talked about before, to find out what you love and what you hate.

[00:42:56] Change your values.

[00:43:02] Next, I would say to make sure that you start communicating and make sure your leaders know the values for your church, for your ministry.

[00:43:13] Maybe it needs to be a correction.

[00:43:16] Maybe you and the leadership have drifted away from those values.

[00:43:20] You forgot who you were.

[00:43:22] Go back and remind yourself and your leadership of your values and what your mission is.

[00:43:28] Why are you doing what you're doing?

[00:43:30] What do you want to accomplish as a group?

[00:43:34] Maybe next would be to take feedback from your leaders.

[00:43:39] Establish values and get that going.

[00:43:43] Help your team then to start embodying those values and living them out and displaying that this is how we treat people around here.

[00:43:52] This is how we do things around here.

[00:43:55] And if you wish to restart the way you do ministry, you go to the leaders.

[00:44:02] You tell them, look, I want to establish a gospel culture around here.

[00:44:07] And it will show maturity and humility, I'm sure.

[00:44:11] And they would want to support you.

[00:44:14] So why does this all matter?

[00:44:16] Why is this something we're even talking about today?

[00:44:21] Several things.

[00:44:22] We show what we believe by how we behave.

[00:44:26] And then next is believers.

[00:44:29] This is how we grow up in our faith.

[00:44:31] Ephesians 4.15 says,

[00:44:33] By practicing the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into Christ.

[00:44:39] And next, our witness as a Christian community is most effective when our behavior shows our faith, when we act out our faith.

[00:44:49] And finally, I want to close with Acts chapter 2.

[00:44:56] So in the book of Acts chapter 2, the church is just starting out.

[00:45:00] And these Bible passages are so often read, but I don't think we should forget them.

[00:45:05] That this is how we do things around here.

[00:45:11] So Acts 2.42.

[00:45:13] They were devoting themselves to the apostles' teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.

[00:45:19] Reverential awe came over everyone, and many wonders and miraculous signs came about by the apostles.

[00:45:26] All who believed were together and held everything in common, and they began selling their property and possessions and distributing the proceeds to everyone as anyone had need.

[00:45:38] Every day they continued to gather together by common consent in the temple courts, breaking bread from house to house, sharing their food with glad and humble hearts, praising God, and having the goodwill of all the people.

[00:45:53] And the Lord was adding to their number every day those who were being saved.

[00:45:58] I love this part, that the effect of living out gospel doctrine was that they had the goodwill of all the people, and the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

[00:46:11] The church was attractive in the beginning because of how they treated one another.

[00:46:17] And there, I believe, is our example of a church culture.

[00:46:23] And finally, a gospel culture humbles us because we are sinners saved by grace, and it also gives us boldness because we are loved completely.

[00:46:38] And so a couple recommendations I have, three recommendations actually.

[00:46:44] So there's a book called You're Not Crazy, Gospel Sanity for Weary Christians by Ray Ortlund and Sam Albury.

[00:46:51] So I love the name, You're Not Crazy.

[00:46:54] And then second, I would recommend a podcast by Craig Groeschel on church culture.

[00:47:00] He has like hundreds of podcasts, but you can look up the one called Church Culture.

[00:47:03] And then next, there's an article by Carrie Neuhoff, How to Create an Amazing Church Culture.

[00:47:10] And you can find that online.

[00:47:12] Thank you, everyone.

[00:47:16] Thank you for joining us today.

[00:47:17] At When She Leads, our mission is to equip, connect, and uplift women in ministry.

[00:47:22] To stay informed about upcoming conferences, events, and online gatherings, visit us at whensheleads.org.

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